Vermont vs. New Hampshire

Hi Friends,

As I am sure all of you know, I live in White River Junction, Vermont. Very few people live in Vermont, and even fewer people have visited it. Thus, the question I get asked more than any other is “What’s the difference between Vermont and New Hampshire?” This is a very good question, and I happen to be in a unique position to answer it. White River Junction is right on the Connecticut River, which is the border with New Hampshire. Since I have spent a lot of time in both states, I decided to answer this timeless question once and for all.

Here are some key differences:

·       New Hampshire is on the right¸ while Vermont is on the left.

·       The capital of New Hampshire is Concord, while the capitol of Vermont is Montpelier.

·       The motto of New Hampshire is “Live Free or Die”, while the motto of Vermont is “Freedom and Unity”.

·       Vermont has more weasels per capita than New Hampshire, but New Hampshire has more largemouth bass per capita than Vermont.

·       The governor of Vermont is a sane Republican, while the governor of New Hampshire is not.

·       My wife is from Vermont, but my ex-wife is from New Hampshire.

·       New Hampshire is 14, and Vermont is 86.

·       In Vermont, when describing individual pieces of cabbage we say leaves of cabbage, while in New Hampshire they say blades of cabbage.

·       Russian Prime Minister Sergei Witte never visited Vermont, and Prussian Prime Minister Prince Adolf zu Hohenlohe-Ingelfingen never visited New Hampshire.

·       Vermont maple syrup is legally required to be inspected for quality control by a large woodchuck prior to its consumption. No one is allowed to question the woodchuck’s judgements. This is not the case in New Hampshire, where maple syrup instead must undergo the Coos County Process. This involves a moose creeping into the factory late at night and whispering its moose nonsense into the vats of syrup. However, in both states, maple syrup is a public utility similar to water or electricity.

·       New Hampshire does not have sales tax, but Vermont offers a free continental breakfast every morning.

·       I have known several people who lived in New Hampshire for several years, only to find that several of their blood vessels had turned to stone. This kind of thing doesn’t happen in Vermont, where the only people stoned are Phish fans.

Hope this clarifies things!

Harold Horseface